I awoke again…being quiet not to awake my brother as he lie next to me…What time was it? I couldn’t tell time properly, but I knew it was not the time for school…I hear the sounds of rustling, and tussling, then the familiar sound of  “Whack,” followed by a whimper and a cry for help….I hated this cry, hated this more that anything I could recall…it caused my heart to race and my stomach to cringe….If only I were bigger….If only I could stop this from occurring…”I WILL stop this one day,” I think, as I lay there with tears in my eyes…I get up…and make my way to the door, crack it open ever so slowly not to be noticed as I wanted to surprise him…”How would I stop this?” I asked myself…”I’m so small and he is huge, the biggest man I know“….I remembered how he would play with me and my brother…We would laugh as he played on the floor with us, toss the ball at us…”How could he be so mean to her?”…she have not done anything…she did everything he asked…How do I know? Caused I helped her….She kept saying, I must get this done before he gets home…He wants his food hot on arrival…She prepared, cooked and waited…and waited…she fed us…and waited…we took our baths so that we wouldn’t be in his way…and she waited…she had to turn the food off…it would have over cooked and burned…and that couldn’t happen…there were no way to keep it hot…besides reheating…Microwaves didn’t exist…It got so late…the darkness came…it extinguished the light and her spirit…She prayed…I know as I recognized that facial expression…the look of despair and desperation….she waited…and she sent us to bed…I said, “good night and I love you” after I said my prayers…”Now I lay me down to sleep…I pray the Lord my soul to keep…and I should die before I wake…I pray the lord my soul you take“…crawled in bed and waited…she waited….I drifted off to sleep…dreams I can’t recall, but I would often dream of a place where things were different…where I would not have to worry about him…about the hard steps, the heavy breathing, the slurred speech, the glassy stares, misplaced smiles, and that bitter, rancid smell….I dreamed I was running and playing in a field tossing a ball with him, he would toss it back and we would just laugh…this was the man I wanted to be with…the man I wanted to teach me how to ride my bike, play ball and cook…as he told me stories of how he was such a great cook…But NO! I didn’t have this man…I was given this horrible, terrible person who reeked and treated her so bad…the door opened slowly…all I could make out was the shadows…he was over her again, swinging…”Whack“…”Diiidn’t I…tell Youse… I want My Food Hot? “Huh“…”It was hot,  I..”…she responded, but before she could finish…”Whack“…this caused her to fall to the floor, like a sack of potatoes…My heart jumped to my throat as my thoughts raced…”Have he killed her? What do I do? He did kill her…Get up! Get up!…NO..Get Up!!”…I looked around and saw the bat…the bat he promised to teach me how play with…I creped out…he didn’t see me…he was kneeled over her…I heard ..”Whack“…Get your asss up!…Nothin’ wronnng wit you…Whack“…My heart racing now…it was beating so hard, I could feel it in my head now…”She is not moving…NO! She is not moving…Get Up!…please Get UP!”…my head begin to hurt…my eyes swelled and tears blinded me…”I’m gonna getcha!…I’m gonna stop you from hurtin’ her!“…I ran towards him…bat drawn back…You gonna pay…I screamed as I swung with all might…all the might a child could muster…”GET OFF HER…LEAVE HER ALONE!“…”WHACK“…..

I jump up, drenched in sweat, breathing hard…” You dreaming again?” ” Yes dear…I’m dreaming again.“…. “You OK?” ….”I fine..“… “K”….She rolls over, I smile at her…get up and go get a drink…If only she knew

Advertisements